I wonder why i ain’t made it yet
Which i’m ashamed to admit
If this sh~t is just an aim and a miss
Then what the f~ck i got to offer? wasn’t raised with no gifts
Started doin little videos to change up the pace
And now those are doin better than the music i make
Now i feel i got to choose between a dream or a notch
And either or not, i’ll probably still be weak with the plot
I’m a veteran in more ways than one in this case
Ten years, got no trophies to place
All i got’s this f~ckin war with all these demons i make
Then givе life, once i speak and brеathe it into the page
Think if i left now, right now, n0body’d miss me
F~ck my soul, its like a blow to my kidneys
I wish i could walk home to a house out of disney
Big yard, pet dog with a frisbee
But instead i come home to this food stamp card
Cause i know that i ain’t tryna pay dues that hard
Ain’t like my siblings, i was never abused that hard
But its hard to get a leg up when you knew that start
‘tween the way that my t~~th rot and the spots on my skin
Got me thinking death is knocking again
And all my goals ain’t accomplished, sh~t, not even a dent
But when i was sixteen i thought i’d prolly ascend
And its not even the views, sh~t i could do without stats
All it does is make me wish my brain was blew with a gat
I guess its all just attention, guess i’m lookin for that
Got so close to the darkness, i think i miss it, in fact
Sh~t, i ain’t the devil but a part of me is
You ask my family they’re as far as it gets
We got the only broken home once my father had split
But that made me who i am, i call his parting a gift
I actually went and developed my own personality
Which is the worst thing you can do, it’s duality
Its quiet when i walk in the room, like who’s mad at me
Cause i ain’t on my f~ckin knees prayin’ like i atta be
I guess i wanted somethin like an “attaboy”
I’m gettin’ on my knees so call the cavalry
I guess i wanted somethin like an “attaboy”
I guess i only f~cking want an “attaboy”
Find more lyrics at westlyrics.com
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nick xl Lyrics – attaboy