Since 2018 we′ve worked at Office Max
A new guy joined the team,
His name was also Max
We made small talk to see what we had in common
Have you seen Rat Race?
He says “yeah I think I saw it”
We wrapped our shift in silence, clocked out at 10:03
Max invites us over,
He’s got Nintendo Wii
We get to his apartment, he says please take off your shoes
I′ll fire up the Wii, and get some beers for you dudes.
We start to take our shoes off when we see it in the foyer
Frozen Flamingos, staring at the wall in horror
It’s a
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
HIS ONLY DECORATION IS A
BLANK WHITE POSTER
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
IT’S LEVELED AND IT′S CENTERED
IT′S A BLANK WHITE POSTER
Is Max a psychopath or does it mean something to him?
Did he get Whoppi’s autograph with a Tide Pen?
Is it a close up of a Polar Bear, or is he Sweeney Todd?
LIke maybe he′s agnostic, it’s a picture of his God.
Is Max a lunatic, or is it avant garde?
Is it a pic of Kathy Bates, and it glows in the dark?
No. This dude is sick and twisted like Jared Leto′s joker
Put Max behind bars, he’s guilty of hanging up a
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
HIS ONLY DECORATION IS A
BLANK WHITE POSTER
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
SAME COLOR AS THE WALLS ITS A
BLANK WHITE
“Everything alright in there, guys?”
“Yeah we′re cool. Just refreshing up!”
“So you guys wanna make your own Mii’s?
Or you wanna use some stock ones? Or what’s up?
The stock ones are pretty funny.
There′s one with a crown and buck teeth that′s pretty funny.”
We should’ve known he′s crazy when he looked us in the face
And said he may or may not have seen Rat Race
You’d know if you saw Smashmouth stick it to John Cleese
Praire-doggin′ with Jon Lovitz
IT’S GOT FRIGGIN′ MR. BEAN
We have to take some action, we’ve been in here for an hour
We climb atop each other’s shoulders
It′s John, Alex, Zack: 6′5″ 6’4″ and 3
In2 1 big giant Tall Boy standing
19 Total Feet.
Max the jig is up, no more playing games!
Lunge across the room, I grab the ornate frame
Smash it on his head, then a flash of light beams
The frame falls to the floor, Max is nowhere to be seen
Turn around the frame, lying in the foyer
Max is in the frame, staring back in horror
From the
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
NOW IT IS A PORTRAIT
OF OUR OFFICE MAX COWORKER
BLANK WHITE POSTER
FRAMED WHITE POSTER
IT TRAPPED HIM WITH OUR BEERS
WHAT A BLANK WHITE BUMMER
We get off each other′s shoulders, we’re weak despite our size
We plan on playing Wii till you all arrive.
To tell you what has happened, so the Tall Boys don′t get framed.
One last question for you,
Have you seen Rat Race?
Thank you for calling the Somerville Police Department.
If you are satisfied with your message please press…
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Kidi Band – Go On
The Strokes – The End Has No End
Tall Boy Special Lyrics – Blank White Poster