Have you heard the one about the shirtless freak?
He liked to siphon gas tanks when he needed a drink
He pranced around the flames like an epileptic mouse
No one could forgive him for burning down that house
When the hearse departed
The great fall started
Ed was incredibly broken-hearted
Gilbert was expendable, I sadly shall suppose
I guess that’s how Bible stories go
Have you heard the one about the withered hag?
She lived in her bed, and pissed into a bag
She pressed random buttons on the ceiling fan remote
And called the police, thinking her TV was broke
Have you heard the one about the senile fool?
He hunched over laughing and fell from his barstool
He stood in the light of the cathedral’s stained glass
And laid on the altar, until the anger passes
When the sparks were flying
Ted was crucifying
Yellowed rats, while all those men weren’t dying
Gilbert was expendable, although I won’t admit
He’d had enough of all our pointless sh#t
Who can blame the man for
Screaming at Abraham the
Man in white had tranquilized his only friend
Gilbert never realized it was right under his nose
But I guess that’s how Bible stories go
And I guess that’s how Bible stories go
And I guess that’s how Bible stories go
Guess that’s how Bible stories go (laughter)
Find more lyrics at westlyrics.com
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