Alright, we got the tenor sax, vocal group
Piano, drums and guitar
We’re all set to make a hit rock & roll record
Now let’s hear it
Hold it. hold it! something’s missing
A teenage idol man, you don’t have a teenage idol
Oh yeah, yeah wait here i’ll get one
Hey kid!
Who me?
Yeah, can you sing?
No
Good. come with me
Say where were you going just now?
I was on my way to high school
Perfect. now you stand up there in front of that
Microphone and say ‘high school’ when i point at ya
Kid you’re gonna be a big record star!
Oo-oo
Hey that’s good too, throw that in. now here we go
High school-oo-oo
High school-oo-oo
High school
High school
High school
Oo-oo
Hеy wait a minute. what did you put that on the end for?
Wеll it was just a little, you know, embellishment
Oh yeah, you keep that up and the first thing you know
This record’ll swing. and then were will we be?
Yeah
Okay you guys, that’s the first side
Isn’t that a kinda short song?
Yeah, it gets more plays that way
Oh i see…
Oh by the way, what’s your name?
Clyde ankle
Perfect!
But i can’t sing
What’s that got to do with anything?
You got all the requirements. a pretty face and a pompadour
Well do i get to pose beside a tiger?
Nah that’s been done. maybe we’ll get you a moose
Well maybe now i can have my adenoids taken out
What, and ruin your amateur standing?
Well could you at least get me a date with that mouseketeer
That’s grown up
Alright, we’ll see
Oh boy!
Ah now, you’re gonna go three nights a week
For finger snapping lessons
Oo i’ve wanted to do that for as long as i’ve
Been in show biz
Hey wait a second. how long have you been in show biz?
About a minute and a half
Oh. now let’s see if you can act humble in front of the press
Okay. oh i’ll never replace elvis…
All right
He’s the king…
All right, all right all ready! don’t over do it
Hey how can we be sure the girls are gonna scream at me?
Ah don’t worry, will ya kid, i got a screaming machine right here
Yeah?
It replaces a teenage audience. we put it in the back of the
Auditorium, push the button, panicsville. here listen
Will you get out of that drummer’s lap
Wow! bent my cymbal man
Now here’s some variations
Whoops, wrong crowd
Well let’s do the other side of the record
I’ll turn on the machine here and there
Uh-huh
Yeah so you can, you know, get conditioned to it
Yeah okay
What am i gonna use for words on this side?
Who cares. say the first thing that comes into your head
Okay. what are you gonna do with that sharp stick?
Oh never mind what i’m gonna do with it. just sing will ya
Here we go
Well i was on my way to high school
When a guyyyyyyyyy came through the door. woo
And he said he was gonna make me a bigggggggg
Record star
I said i can’t sing. woo. he said it doesn’t matter. woo
He said you got a pretty face and a pommmmpadour
Don’t ya fool with that stick man!
Aaaaaahh
Don’t need anything
But a pretty face. mm woo
And long black hair to toss. ooo
With the possssssible exception of blue cross. ooo
Oh perfect. stick with me kid
Clyde ankle is gonna jump up the charts
He is if you keep on with that stick man
All right…
Well… you really think you can get any disc jockeys
To play my songs?
It’s getting tougher, but i’m on my way to see one right now
Oh boy
Right after i stop off at the bank
Ha the old payola roll blues huh?
What kind of a crack is that?
That’s an insult to my integrity
Your name is what?
Barney schlock, i got this little record company
Uh-huh
Obscurity records
It would be yeah
Look i know the probe is on, but i got a record here
That’s got to happen. high school oo oo by clyde ankle
How’s about it baby, you wanna jump on it?
Crazy, lay it on the floor
Lay it on the floor… ha ha… hey that’s pretty good, i got
To remember that… ha ha ha
Ah shall we say fifty clams a week to ride it?
Huh? i mean really ride it
Man i wouldn’t ride something called high school oo oo
If it had a vicuna saddle
Yeah but
You got the wrong disc jockey and the wrong station clyde
Barney. look if it gets in the top 40 you’ll have to play it
Yeah? i’ll play that jazz the day ella sings the fats domino
Song book
Well i’d like to get your opinion…
No…
See what you think of it
No man…
Let’s just listen to a little of it
Don’t let it touch my turntable man…
Wait a minute…
I just had shearing on there man…
Look it will only take a few seconds, listen
Ah you didn’t hear enough of it
Too much, i heard too much!
All right you’ll see. the kids will eat it up
They think that’s good singin’
Is it?
Oh not really baby, but don’t tell the kids i said so huh
(ha ha ha) us little rock & roll labels got a good thing goin’
We pay off a few guys in the key cities here
Rig a few charts there, bingo a new hit parade
And that’s how rock & roll was born. (ha ha ha)
Yeah i’m hip
Look kid, if you don’t want bread, what do you need?
A little dental work, a trip to vegas?
Forget it!
Pre 1959 cranberries?
You’re all heart barney
Heart?
That thing right behind your shoulder holster
Huh? oh, oh yeah…
So ah, you don’t wanna give high school oo oo a ride then huh?
Only on a rail
Ah listen kid, payola’s the only way a little record artist
Can get off the ground
Yeah? did you ever hear of talent?
No. who does he record for?
Look, nothing really good ever had to pay to get played
Only junk. the majority of disc jockeys never played ball with
You at any price. but that’s all over now. you’ve been benched
I have?
And not a moment too soon. if your game had gone on
Much longer, the kids would have forgotten what music
Sounded like
I’ve almost forgotten myself
Not me. can i show you to the door?
No, i’ll just slide out under it
That figures
Don’t worry, i’ll be glad to get out of the music business…
You know what? you were never in it
Stanley
Yeah billy
Has he gone?
Yeah
I thought he’d never leave like
Didn’t we all. here, you want a copy of high school oo oo?
Crazy. i’ll have it melted down in to a little vinylite statue
Of conway twitty
Why not. you ready judd?
Yeah
Okay hit it billy
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye obscurity records
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye you overnight one shot
Hello music hello swing
Hello jazz you beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
So long so long
So long you nasal obstruction
You had your day
But paved your way to destruction
(short fat mabel, said she wasn’t able
I told you listen mama, don’t you…)
So long music parasite
So long tin pan amateur night
Goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye
Hello music
Hello swing
Hello jazz
You beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
To you
Hello hello alright, we got the tenor sax, vocal group
Piano, drums and guitar
We’re all set to make a hit rock & roll record
Now let’s hear it
Old it. hold it! something’s missing
A teenage idol man, you don’t have a teenage idol
Oh yeah, yeah wait here i’ll get one
Hey kid!
Who me?
Yeah, can you sing?
No
Good. come with me
Say where were you going just now?
I was on my way to high school
Perfect. now you stand up there in front of that
Microphone and say ‘high school’ when i point at ya
Kid you’re gonna be a big record star!
Oo-oo
Hey that’s good too, throw that in. now here we go
High school-oo-oo
High school-oo-oo
High school
High school
High school
Oo-oo
Hey wait a minute. what did you put that on the end for?
Well it was just a little, you know, embellishment
Oh yeah, you keep that up and the first thing you know
This record’ll swing. and then were will we be?
Yeah
Okay you guys, that’s the first side
Isn’t that a kinda short song?
Yeah, it gets more plays that way
Oh i see…
Oh by the way, what’s your name?
Clyde ankle
Perfect!
But i can’t sing
What’s that got to do with anything?
You got all the requirements. a pretty face and a pompadour
Well do i get to pose beside a tiger?
Nah that’s been done. maybe we’ll get you a moose
Well maybe now i can have my adenoids taken out
What, and ruin your amateur standing?
Well could you at least get me a date with that mouseketeer
That’s grown up
Alright, we’ll see
Oh boy!
Ah now, you’re gonna go three nights a week
For finger snapping lessons
Oo i’ve wanted to do that for as long as i’ve
Been in show biz
Hey wait a second. how long have you been in show biz?
About a minute and a half
Oh. now let’s see if you can act humble in front of the press
Okay. oh i’ll never replace elvis…
All right
He’s the king…
All right, all right all ready! don’t over do it
Hey how can we be sure the girls are gonna scream at me?
Ah don’t worry, will ya kid, i got a screaming machine right here
Yeah?
It replaces a teenage audience. we put it in the back of the
Auditorium, push the button, panicsville. here listen
Will you get out of that drummer’s lap
Wow! bent my cymbal man
Now here’s some variations
Whoops, wrong crowd
Well let’s do the other side of the record
I’ll turn on the machine here and there
Uh-huh
Yeah so you can, you know, get conditioned to it
Yeah okay
What am i gonna use for words on this side?
Who cares. say the first thing that comes into your head
Okay. what are you gonna do with that sharp stick?
Oh never mind what i’m gonna do with it. just sing will ya
Here we go
Well i was on my way to high school
When a guyyyyyyyyy came through the door. woo
And he said he was gonna make me a bigggggggg
Record star
I said i can’t sing. woo. he said it doesn’t matter. woo
He said you got a pretty face and a pommmmpadour
Aaaaaahh
Don’t need anything
But a pretty face. mm woo
And long black hair to toss. ooo
With the possssssible exception of blue cross. ooo
Oh perfect. stick with me kid
Clyde ankle is gonna jump up the charts
He is if you keep on with that stick man
All right…
Well… you really think you can get any disc jockeys
To play my songs?
It’s getting tougher, but i’m on my way to see one right now
Oh boy
Right after i stop off at the bank
Ha the old payola roll blues huh?
What kind of a crack is that?
That’s an insult to my integrity
Your name is what?
Barney schlock, i got this little record company
Uh-huh
Obscurity records
It would be yeah
Look i know the probe is on, but i got a record here
That’s got to happen. high school oo oo by clyde ankle
How’s about it baby, you wanna jump on it?
Crazy, lay it on the floor
Lay it on the floor… ha ha… hey that’s pretty good, i got
To remember that… ha ha ha
Ah shall we say fifty clams a week to ride it?
Huh? i mean really ride it
Dj) man i wouldn’t ride something called high school oo oo
If it had a vicuna saddle
Yeah but
You got the wrong disc jockey and the wrong station clyde
Barney. look if it gets in the top 40 you’ll have to play it
Yeah? i’ll play that jazz the day ella sings the fats domino
Song book
Well i’d like to get your opinion…
No…
See what you think of it
No man…
Let’s just listen to a little of it
Don’t let it touch my turntable man…
Wait a minute…
I just had shearing on there man…
Look it will only take a few seconds, listen
Ah you didn’t hear enough of it
Too much, i heard too much!
All right you’ll see. the kids will eat it up
They think that’s good singin’
Is it?
Oh not really baby, but don’t tell the kids i said so huh
(ha ha ha) us little rock & roll labels got a good thing goin’
We pay off a few guys in the key cities here
Rig a few charts there, bingo a new hit parade
And that’s how rock & roll was born. (ha ha ha)
Yeah i’m hip
Look kid, if you don’t want bread, what do you need?
A little dental work, a trip to vegas?
Forget it!
Pre 1959 cranberries?
You’re all heart barney
Heart?
That thing right behind your shoulder holster
Huh? oh, oh yeah…
So ah, you don’t wanna give high school oo oo a ride then huh?
Only on a rail
Ah listen kid, payola’s the only way a little record artist
Can get off the ground
Yeah? did you ever hear of talent?
No. who does he record for?
Look, nothing really good ever had to pay to get played
Only junk. the majority of disc jockeys never played ball with
You at any price. but that’s all over now. you’ve been benched
I have?
And not a moment too soon. if your game had gone on
Much longer, the kids would have forgotten what music
Sounded like
I’ve almost forgotten myself
Not me. can i show you to the door?
No, i’ll just slide out under it
That figures
Don’t worry, i’ll be glad to get out of the music business… what? you you know were never in it
Stanley
Yeah billy
Has he gone?
Yeah
I thought he’d never leave like
Didn’t we all. here, you want a copy of high school oo oo?
Crazy. i’ll have it melted down in to a little vinylite statue
Of conway twitty
Why not. you ready judd?
Yeah
Okay hit it billy
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye obscurity records
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye you overnight one shot
Hello music hello swing
Hello jazz you beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
So long so long
So long you nasal obstruction
You had your day
But paved your way to destruction
(short fat mabel, said she wasn’t able
I told you listen mama, don’t you…)
So long music parasite
So long tin pan amateur night
Goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye
Hello music
Hello swing
Hello jazz
You beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
To you
Hello hello alright, we got the tenor sax, vocal group
Piano, drums and guitar
We’re all set to make a hit rock & roll record
Now let’s hear hold it. hold it! something’s missing
A teenage idol man, you don’t have a teenage idol
Oh yeah, yeah wait here i’ll get one
Hey kid!
Who me?
Yeah, can you sing?
No
Good. come with me
Say where were you going just now?
I was on my way to high school
Perfect. now you stand up there in front of that
Microphone and say ‘high school’ when i point at ya
Kid you’re gonna be a big record star!
Oo-oo
Hey that’s good too, throw that in. now here we go
High school-oo-oo
High school-oo-oo
High school
High school
High school
Oo-oo
Hey wait a minute. what did you put that on the end for?
Well it was just a little, you know, embellishment
Oh yeah, you keep that up and the first thing you know
This record’ll swing. and then were will we be?
Yeah
Okay you guys, that’s the first side
Isn’t that a kinda short song?
Yeah, it gets more plays that
Oh by the way, what’s your name?
Clyde ankle
Perfect!
But i can’t sing
What’s that got to do with anything?
You got all the requirements. a pretty face and a pompadour
Well do i get to pose beside a tiger?
Nah that’s been done. maybe we’ll get you a moose
Well maybe now i can have my adenoids taken out
What, and ruin your amateur standing?
Well could you at least get me a date with that mouseketeer
That’s grown up
Alright, we’ll see
Oh boy!
Ah now, you’re gonna go three nights a week
For finger snapping lessons
Oo i’ve wanted to do that for as long as i’ve
Been in show biz
Hey wait a second. how long have you been in show biz?
About a minute and a half
Oh. now let’s see if you can act humble in front of the press
Okay. oh i’ll never replace elvis…
All right
He’s the king…
All right, all right all ready! don’t over do it
Hey how can we be sure the girls are gonna scream at me?
Ah don’t worry, will ya kid, i got a screaming machine right here
Yeah?
It replaces a teenage audience. we put it in the back of the
Auditorium, push the button, panicsville. here listen
Will you get out of that drummer’s lap
Wow! bent my cymbal man
Now here’s some variations
Whoops, wrong crowd
Well let’s do the other side of the record
I’ll turn on the machine here and there
Uh-huh
Yeah so you can, you know, get conditioned to it
Yeah okay
What am i gonna use for words on this side?
Who cares. say the first thing that comes into your head
Okay. what are you gonna do with that sharp stick?
Oh never mind what i’m gonna do with it. just sing will ya
Here we go
Well i was on my way to high school
When a guyyyyyyyyy came through the door. woo
And he said he was gonna make me a bigggggggg
Record star
I said i can’t sing. woo. he said it doesn’t matter. woo
He said you got a pretty face and a pommmmpadour
Aaaaaahh
Don’t need anything
But a pretty face. mm woo
And long black hair to toss. ooo
With the possssssible exception of blue cross. ooo
Oh perfect. stick with me kid
Clyde ankle is gonna jump up the charts
He is if you keep on with that stick man
All right…
Well… you really think you can get any disc jockeys
To play my songs?
It’s getting tougher, but i’m on my way to see one right now
Oh boy
Right after i stop off at the bank
Ha the old payola roll blues huh?
What kind of a crack is that?
That’s an insult to my integrity
Your name is what?
Barney schlock, i got this little record company
Uh-huh
Obscurity records
It would be yeah
Look i know the probe is on, but i got a record here
That’s got to happen. high school oo oo by clyde ankle
How’s about it baby, you wanna jump on it?
Crazy, lay it on the floor
Lay it on the floor… ha ha… hey that’s pretty good, i got
To remember that… ha ha ha
Ah shall we say fifty clams a week to ride it?
Huh? i mean really ride it
Man i wouldn’t ride something called high school oo oo
If it had a vicuna saddle
Yeah but
You got the wrong disc jockey and the wrong station clyde
Barney. look if it gets in the top 40 you’ll have to play it
Yeah? i’ll play that jazz the day ella sings the fats domino
Song book
Well i’d like to get your opinion…
No…
See what you think of it
No man…
Let’s just listen to a little of it
Don’t let it touch my turntable man…
Wait a minute…
I just had shearing on there man…
Look it will only take a few seconds, listen
Ah you didn’t hear enough of it
Too much, i heard too much!
All right you’ll see. the kids will eat it up
They think that’s good singin’
Is it?
Oh not really baby, but don’t tell the kids i said so huh
(ha ha ha) us little rock & roll labels got a good thing goin’
We pay off a few guys in the key cities here
Rig a few charts there, bingo a new hit parade
And that’s how rock & roll was born. (ha ha ha)
Yeah i’m hip
Look kid, if you don’t want bread, what do you need?
A little dental work, a trip to vegas?
Forget it!
Pre 1959 cranberries?
You’re all heart barney
Heart?
That thing right behind your shoulder holster
Huh? oh, oh yeah…
So ah, you don’t wanna give high school oo oo a ride then huh?
Only on a rail
Ah listen kid, payola’s the only way a little record artist
Can get off the ground
Yeah? did you ever hear of talent?
No. who does he record for?
Look, nothing really good ever had to pay to get played
Only junk. the majority of disc jockeys never played ball with
You at any price. but that’s all over now. you’ve been benched
I have?
And not a moment too soon. if your game had gone on
Much longer, the kids would have forgotten what music
Sounded like
I’ve almost forgotten myself
Not me. can i show you to the door?
No, i’ll just slide out under it
That figures
Don’t worry, i’ll be glad to get out of the music business…
You know what? you were never in it
Stanley
Yeah billy
Has he gone?
Yeah
I thought he’d never leave like
Didn’t we all. here, you want a copy of high school oo oo?
Crazy. i’ll have it melted down in to a little vinylite statue
Of conway twitty
Why not. you ready judd?
Yeah
Okay hit it billy
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye obscurity records
Goodbye goodbye
Goodbye you overnight one shot
Hello music hello swing
Hello jazz you beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
So long so long
So long you nasal obstruction
You had your day
But paved your way to destruction
(short fat mabel, said she wasn’t able
I told you listen mama, don’t you…)
So long music parasite
So long tin pan amateur night
Goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye goodbye
Hello music
Hello swing
Hello jazz
You beautiful thing
Hello hello hello hello hello
To you
Hello hello
Find more lyrics at westlyrics.com
Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate and an Apple Partner, we earn from qualifying purchases
Stan Freberg Lyrics – Old payola roll blues