Once upon a time there was a kid who found a bug
While running round in silly circles in his bare feet on the rug
He picked it up and licked it and he gave a little shrug
There was a slightly slurpy sound and no more bug
Yes, I know a kid who ate a bug
He slurped it up and swallowed it;
It tickled and it scratched a bit
Yes, it’s true. He ate a living bug
Now here’s what happened to the kid who ate a bug
The kid was feeling fine for just about a day or two or three
Then suddenly his tummy started feeling very tickley
His mother took his tеmperature and it was only 93
She said, “You nеver should have ate that bug!”
She took him to the doctor and the doctor got his x-ray out
He put the kid inside and looked him upside down and inside out
He cleared his throat and hummed a note and scratched his head and turned about
He said, “You know, I think he ate a bug.”
“Yes, I think he might have ate a bug
Let me look into my microscope and listen with my stethoscope
Why, it’s true! He ate a living bug!”
Now here’s what happened to the kid who ate a bug
As the week wore on his turning tummy felt more tickley
The doctor took a look; the bug was multiplying rapidly
The count was up to 59 then 64 then 83
Then 97 tummy tickling bugs
The doc prescribed a pesticide and bathed him in formaldehyde
But everything he tried the bugs defied, and still they multiplied
That night the kid could never get to sleep; he was too terrified
Because he heard the voices of the bugs
They were singing: “Join our band of merry little bugs
Marching up your spine and down your spleen
And all the places in between.”
Yes, he heard the sound of singing bugs
And here’s what happened to the kid who ate a bug
The kid was going crazy now; the tickling was everywhere
The thousand bugs inside him were a thousand more than he could bear
He threw himself upon the floor and kicked and screamed and pulled his hair
But still he heard the voices of the bugs
Well, finally the kid wore out and lay there thinking miserably
Of something that his dad had said when he was only two or three
About the proper thing to do when you can’t beat your enemy
And so he joined the band of merry bugs
“Join our band of merry little bugs
We are marching in and out your nose and in between your dirty toes
Join our band of merry little bugs
We are marching through your tangled hair and in and out your underwear.”
“Join our band of merry little bugs!”
So he joined the band of merry little bugs
And that’s what happened to the kid who ate a bug!
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Monty Harper Lyrics – The Kid Who Ate a Bug